Co-Regulation and Sensory Comfort for SEN Children
After our recent episode on Raising Confident Kids with SEN, I’ve been bursting with insights and anecdotes from my chat with Amanda Clifford. Today, I’m excited to share a recap of our conversation and some practical tips we discussed.
Understanding co-regulation
Our conversation opened up with the concept of co-regulation. As a parent, it's fascinating to think about how much our kids rely on us for emotional support. Co-regulation is all about maintaining that emotional 'green zone' where we and our children can both thrive. For infants and young kids, this need is even more pronounced.
The takeaway here is clear: Our own emotional regulation is essential to support our child's journey. By managing our emotions, we can be present and grounded for our children as they navigate their own feelings. When we're calm, we can offer them the physical comfort they need, like hugs or firm pressure that makes them feel safe and soothed.
Sensory strategies that shine
Amanda brilliantly broke down the link between sensory input and emotional regulation. Every child is different, and identifying the right sensory strategies for your little one can be a game-changer. It's about finding what helps them feel just right, whether it's deep pressure, engaging in high-energy activities, or just having a quiet moment. Here's a tip that stuck with me: Before you try to reason with a child who's overwhelmed, make sure their sensory needs are met. Also, wait for your child to be ready for physical comfort—it can make all the difference.
Parents need their own toolkit
One of the most resonant messages from Amanda was about the importance of self-care for parents. She stressed the significance of having our own strategies for regulation, like regular breathing exercises and moments of self-care. This goes a long way in managing the chronic stress of parenting children with SEN. I've personally felt the impact of my own regulation on the emotional climate of our home. It's like the seasons - you change the temperature and the whole landscape shifts.
Rethinking clothing for sensory comfort
One of our listeners, Michelle, shared her concerns about her son's distress with clothing sensations. Amanda's response was a gentle reminder that these struggles can be linked to a child's heightened anxiety. She offered practical advice like choosing clothes that feel good, using fabric softener to reduce irritants, and implementing deep pressure activities before dressing.
Every energy is unique
We also delve into parenting strategies for managing energy levels. Mirroring a child's energy can be effective, but sometimes a contrasting, calm presence is what's needed. Being in a good emotional place ourselves before entering a therapy session is invaluable not just for ourselves but also for our children.
Routine and matching energy
Amanda shared her own experience raising four kids, including twins! Routine was her life-safer, helping manage schedules and stress. And while mirroring a child's energy level can be a powerful technique, we also talked about the importance of food in helping kids ground themselves and manage emotions. Finally, Amanda reminded us of the power of validation and creating a shared experience in dealing with emotions. It's about helping children recognise and name what they feel, and understanding the physical sensations that go along with those emotions.
This episode has been a heartwarming and insightful journey further into understanding our children and, importantly, ourselves. Remember that your presence, patience, and personal toolbox of strategies are some of the most powerful gifts you can give your child.